I’m reaching out for some input today. I’ve been blogging for about a month now and I really enjoy it. Writing allows me to process so many thoughts and feelings and it also gives me a chance to get feedback from others in similar situations. I was a little nervous about whether or not anyone would want to read anything I had to say because my life wasn’t sad anymore as it was the first time I wrote in front of an online audience. I’ve found that generally sad makes for good writing and reading, and I imagine that my other story was probably right up there with really sad stories. A young, strong, personal trainer, husband and father fighting brain cancer for three years while his wife and four young children, one a severally handicapped child, try to maintain some sort of life in the midst of so much pain and suffering. People gravitate towards sad because it is a universal feeling of all mankind. Everyone understands pain, from Africa to America to Australia and back to Canada, it is the tie that binds us in our humanity. People also tend to feel a little bit better about their own lives when they are reading about something so heartbreaking that someone else is going through for it puts their personal lives into a different perspective. Finally, it is the heartbreaking aspect of it; we can hardly turn our eyes away from the grotesque suffering of it all, and we root so hard for those suffering to experience joy once again. So again I wasn’t sure anyone would want to read about my happiness when "sad" seemed to sell so well the first time around. Someone on my former blog commented that reading my writing was interesting because they felt like they were literally inside my head. Unfortunately you are when I write. I may buffer it down a bit, “graceful grit” as Ryan would call it, but generally I write what I feel, maybe with a softer edge than if it were vocalized but it’s the same idea in the end.
Today I’m trying to get a feel for what people like to read about on a blog or on my blog for that matter. I’ve read the blogger advice of “pick a topic and stick to it” but I don’t know if that’s my style. I have a lot of thoughts about a lot of things. I know I like to read about controversial topics on other blogs, or topics that no one else will write about because it might offend someone, or just hot topics that people are talking about in their inner circles. There are the mom blogs with the mom take on everything, which I do enjoy reading, but I have to say, most people get bored rather quickly just reading about your children’s antics unless it’s grandma or grandpa reading the blog. There’s the grief part that I enjoy writing about and it’s about as universal as it gets. Everyone has experienced grief in one way or another and there are oodles of books out there telling you how you should work through it and whether or not you’re doing it properly. This I find very interesting because it’s usually based on just one person’s take on how the whole world should be grieving. Obviously I have some thoughts on this topic. I could write about being married to a widower/widow. Now this is a topic I never realized had an entire subculture of silence surrounding it until I became a part of it. This is such a sticky, messy, potentially emotionally draining and challenging subject that many may not get a lot out of it unless they are personally involved in it. It’s very hard to even begin to grasp the feelings of what goes on in and around one of these marriages, especially in the early stages of it. Ryan and I have written our own rule book on how we choose to handle it and it works very well for our relationship. I could write about faith, or marriage or sex but not sure you want that topic from the woman with 7 kids:-) I’m asking for some input today because I don’t want to become monotonous or boring. Write me, message me, or email and let me know if the above are interesting topics or if you have something else, and I'll do my best to tackle it. Maybe I can even get my husband to write a time or two for he is also part of the BIG mess, and he’s a writer so he can offer a different perspective.
Just keep livin!